Twitting – Tweeting....What?

Over the last few days I seem to have been compelled to ‘Tweet’, whatever that really means.  Is it the right word?  I have no idea.  But I’m sure you know what I’m talking about even if I do not!

There have been a few interesting things poking up through the deluge of nonsense that seems to be a feature of these social pages.  ‘Facebook’ users will recognise this intimately, no doubt.  I try to avoid most of them but this ‘Tweeting’ has caught my eye.

One of the reasons that I look at ‘Tweet’ is that I can follow snippets, of One Hundred and Forty characters at a time, from some of my favourite people.  Khairul Hisham, Neil deGrasse Tyson, Neil Gaiman, Janie Bill, India Drummond, to name just a few.  These are all people in the field of popular writing or art except Neil deGrasse Tyson who is an Astrophysicist and Communicator with a wicked sense of humour and so qualifies as ‘one of us’!

The one that grabbed me by the eyeballs was Neil Gaiman posting a ‘Tweet’ referring to the review of a story by one particular (fairly new) author by one (fairly new) reviewer.  Now, I really do not want to go into details because the author has already been sufficiently reviled by everyone from the industry to the average reader in the street.  Sufficient it is to do a few thoughts on this from the point of view of an author and a reviewer.

Start with the reviewer.  He did a good job, if a kindly one.  He said that the story was fine; he had no argument with that.  He did, however, stumble on some of the grammar and syntax used.

I have, myself, mentioned this occasionally.  My comments about these things are normally in the vein of “I am old.  Does the correct usage of English no longer matter?  Are we conditioned to accept the devaluation and decay of the language through advertising and sundry media sources so that we are unconcerned if it overflows into our storybooks?  Or am I just old-fashioned?  Sentences like “Me and Harold went for a run...” and “They walked over to Bill and I....” have become acceptable?  “I will come over....” and “The three of them looked at each other...” are now the norm?  I believe writers need to adopt a more pedantic approach when it comes to the use of our beautiful language.

The reviewer, then, was not only correct in his statements since he gave examples for us to see as evidence, but that he was also being kind and considerate to the author whose book he was reviewing.  The phrasing in the examples was, shall we say, dire.

Now let us consider this from the author’s perspective.  Her replies were exceptionally rude and immensely negative.  Not only did she refute the remarks made by the reviewer but also introduced some specious argument based on the ‘edition’ provided.  She then went on to use foul language; this is never acceptable in an open forum.

[Yes, I know.  I use some words that are short of ‘polite in mixed company’, as they used to tell me when I was small, in my stories occasionally.  My stories are aimed at an adult market unless otherwise indicated on the package.  So I am not being hypocritical.  Hmph!]

The point is that the author was in denial.  She insisted that her work was excellent in spite of the overwhelming evidence to the contrary from.... well.... everyone, really.  Reading her biography and ‘blurbs’ on ‘Amazon’ did little to dispel the notion that here is someone who is in urgent need of professional help both with her English and with her mental state and is, equally, unlikely to go and get that help!

What do we, fair reader, gain from this?

Firstly, that nobody is perfect.  We all make mistakes.  All.  (Stop shaking your head at the back, there!)

Secondly, that not everybody will like what you write.  We are, all of us, different.  We have different tastes.  I like to write Sci-Fi/Fantasy, not everyone’s cup of tea.  Some people like to write romance and historical novels; these leave me a bit cold, I’m sorry to say.

Thirdly, if someone takes the time and trouble to pay for and read your story they are very kind.  If they say that they don’t like it then thank them for their trouble and absorb any constructive criticism that comes your way.  Of course, a good reviewer will tell you why they don’t like it and not just say “Blurgh!” and leave it at that.  Even a bad review will attract somebody’s attention and, maybe, they will see something good in it.

Never, ever fight the reviewer.  Never, ever, resort to foul and abusive language.  If your writing really was that bad you may well find that crossing verbal swords with such a person may put you at something of a disadvantage!  

All that will be left for you to resort to is “F*** off!”

Meditations on Writing

In a few moments of enforced idleness I had a little cogitate.  No, really!  Rather along these lines:

It seems to me that there are only two ways to write a book.

Firstly, let's just examine what L Ron Hubbard had to say about it.  I paraphrase because I cannot remember, now, the exact words:

He said that you should never do a writing course.

I agree with that.  It is a bit like going to Art School.  You get to absorb the way that others do things and that takes the edge off the way you do it.  Art School is good for specific, mechanical, techniques - how to do ink and wash, how to use oils, water colours, scraperboard and also the more mathematical side like perspectives - I still have nightmares about those!  But style and content and how you combine those techniques are yours.

So what did L Ron suggest is the correct method?  He said:

"Write, write and write again.  Then, write some more.  When you are thoroughly sick of writing, write again.  Like anything else you only get to be good at it by practice."

Is he correct?  I think so.

Now let's go back to my theory.  This has, very likely, been proposed before by others but it is, right now, something that has crept insidiously into my head and the only way to extract it is to write it down.

Two ways to write a story.  You can fill in extras as you see best fit, of course.  Opinions and ideas are free and welcome.

First way:

Get the idea.  Write the framework.  Put in 'waypoints' to navigate by.  Write the start and the end.  Fill in odd details along your 'Masterplan'.  Research the subject and any points you want to include and insert them in 'The Plan'.  Now write the whole thing to that plan using words as cement to glue the waypoints together.

Second way:

Have the idea.  Sort out a beginning and a few characters.  Have a general idea of how you want it to end. Start writing.  Let the characters take over and follow them through their journey.  You may have to change location from time to time but still listen to them.  Live the story in your head and just use it as an exercise in dictation.

I like the second way.  The story, for me, flows better using this method.

For you?  I don't know.  Whatever you are comfortable with and brings you satisfaction.

I do insist on this, though!

If you enjoy writing it then somebody will enjoy reading it.  If writing is a chore then reading it will be, too.

So.

When you write happy bits  -  smile.

When you write sad bits - cry.

It will show.