The Village Mentality

When I was small there was a plague of spider crabs that visited us from out of the depths of the English Channel—or ‘La Manche’ as our closest European friends might say.

At that time I was wont to go snorkelling around the coastline near our village. Just looking, really. Hoping to see fish of any sort.

The crabs were irresistible. There were so many of them! I took a bag of twelve, or so, of the largest that I could select and presented them to Mum. I thought she would be happy but Dad said that you can’t eat those, they are, he assured me, poisonous.

At that age one does not question the wisdom of elders and, specifically, parents.

Anyway, I removed the claws and boiled them. They were delicious. The bodies were ceremoniously dumped at some remote site up in the woods.

Nowadays I am aware that spider crabs are a delicacy in many places—known for their flavour.

Some years later a ‘Kentucky Fried Chicken’ establishment opened up in the Exeter Road of the large town near where I lived. It was actually about eight miles away (around 12 kms) but it was regarded as the big town. It wasn’t big but we thought so. Exmouth was bigger than Budleigh Salterton and, indeed, Budleigh only had one cinema where Exmouth had two!

But I digress. This ‘Kentucky Fried Chicken ‘ opened to a fanfare of total silence. Few people went there at first. I asked Dad about it. I asked him if we could sample the chicken?

He informed me that they only pay a penny each for the birds, they are battery chickens—there’s no meat on them. “It’s a catchpenny*”, he told me.

So we left it alone.

Not until many, many years later did we get a bucket of chicken for Mum and the removal men, when Mum was moving out, as a convenient way to feed everyone. Not until then did we realise that Mum had never had a ‘KFC’, as it is generally known.

She thought it was delicious. Thoroughly enjoyed it.

It wasn’t Dad’s fault. These edicts came about because he had been ‘told by a friend’.

It would never occur to people to ask an expert—or, even, ask the manager of KFC about his source of meat.

We have all experienced it. There are common phrases attached to this:

“It’s obvious, isn’t it?”

“It stands to reason, doesn’t it?”

“Everybody knows that!”

So the prejudices flow. False information floods down the generations and from village to village.

It is the village mentality and it exists World-wide.

It is negative.

Know your place in society. ‘Better people than you’ have tried, or thought, or planned, something.

Anything to put you down. Anything to drag you down to their view of the World. Anything to make you conform to their lack of ambition.

In some places it is known as the ‘Barrel of Crabs’. This is a condition where one crab will try to escape from the barrel but the others will pull it down—for reasons best known to themselves.

I prefer the ‘Nine Monkeys’ analogy.

Put nine monkeys in a large cage. And then put in a stepladder. Over the ladder hang a bunch of bananas.

Wait.

Eventually, one of the monkeys will make a plan; climb the ladder and reach for the bananas.

At this point all the other monkeys at the bottom of the ladder will be thoroughly doused, by you, in cold water.

The next day a new bunch of bananas is put over the ladders and the process repeated. It should be noted that the same monkey will climb the ladders because it has learnt that the reward is available without personal risk. The other monkeys will become cold and wet again.

On the third day the other monkeys will prevent the ninth monkey from climbing the steps. They have also learnt that his reward is tainted with their punishment.

Now replace one of the monkeys.

The new one will observe the bananas and the ladder. A plan will form and an attempt to scale the ladder will take place. The other monkeys will prevent this from happening. The new monkey has no idea why he is being prevented from reaching the bananas but will conform to the group’s will.

On subsequent days the monkeys will be replaced, one by one, until all the monkeys are ‘new’. None of them have been made cold and wet but they all know that something bad will happen if an effort to reach the bananas is made.

None of the monkeys has any clue why this should be but they will adhere to ‘The Rule’.

There go all of us.

We do things because they are the ‘norm’; because they are tradition; because they are part of our culture.

Depart from that practice and you will be outcast, ostracised or regarded as a non-conformist or, worse, a lunatic.

We often see people playing safe. They wish to ingratiate themselves with their ‘own crowd’ and so they denigrate others instead of promoting their own beliefs or traditions.

It is always easier to drag others down than it is to build your own view up.

I have often said, “Putting someone else’s light out does not make yours burn any brighter.”

And so it is.

The social media is full of people who will insult you or drag you down because you do not conform to their ideas or opinions.

This does not make you wrong. It does not make them better or, even, more idealistic.

It makes you different.

‘Vive le difference!’

Let the insults slide off.

A person just told me, in response to the statement that I am an author and ‘Blogger’, that I should “do the world a favour and stop writing now”. It must have been an important point because it was all in upper case letters.

His opinion. Should I obey?

No. He is not an arbiter of my life.

Has it spoilt my life?

Not for a moment.

Do not let negative people spoil your life. Let them live their life and you continue with yours.

Aim for your dreams, aspirations, hopes and desires and let others do the same.

We are different. We are not better or worse than anyone else.

Just different.

* Catchpenny:  Having a cheap superficial attractiveness designed to encourage quick sales.