Miss Sherlock

I spent a leisurely hour just recently watching ‘ASTRO TV'. Because I was at a complete loss as to what to watch I decided, in the end, to see what came up at random.

Lo and behold, a Japanese production appeared entitled ‘Miss Sherlock’ listed on HBO. It was labeled as 'Series 1 Episode 1'

Who could resist?

Stunned into looking at it I made the appropriate selection and was entranced by how awkwardly the whole thing was assembled.

In the first episode – the only one that I have had the courage to watch, a man’s stomach explodes at the airport while he was greeting one of his ex-colleagues back from her stint in Syria.

The young lady is suitably shocked as was his wife when she appeared. By the time the senior detective had attempted to console them the body had been removed.

Curiously, the need was now to get an identification of the body. One wonders why the young doctor returning to Japan from Syria could not have provided this. But… no. The colleague and the wife were ushered into a side room at the airport where another woman was digging around in the dead man’s belly!

This new character was introduced as ‘Sherlock’, who claimed that speed was of the essence in looking for clues and that she did not want the body messed up by some inadequate junior pathologist.

And so we go on. The sub-titles were adequate – probably. I say ‘probably’ because my knowledge of Japanese (nil) prohibited me from making an accurate judgement.

Of course, this Sherlock entered her apartment that was numbered 221B. The landlady did not give her name but I did wonder how they were going to get ‘Miss Hudson’ into the local language!

At this point another young man’s stomach exploded. 

Sherlock decides that a capsule had been administered to both parties. The capsule was designed for pharmaceutical purposes but had been modified into a bomb using a substance known as ‘Devil’s Brew’, or some such nonsense.

Considering the size of the capsule and the amount of damage inflicted this ‘Devil’s Brew’ must be enormously effective.

So it went on… and on… and on…

Until, at last the case was solved. The wife did it but, it seems, under the influence of another, unknown, person.

I smell the appearance, at some point, of the dreaded Moriarty.

Incredible coincidence when Sherlock’s brother appears and is said to be involved at a high level in some secretive Government Department.

The young doctor who returned from Syria does not wish to continue her career in medicine. Surprise. Her hotel burns down, she has nowhere to go. Surprise. Stunningly, she is to be looked after by Sherlock – at the insistence of Sherlock’s brother. I did not hear the name ‘Mycroft’ anywhere so I suspect that has been glossed over.

What I did hear, at the end, is that the young doctor announced that her name is Wato. Sherlock’s brother immediately referred to her as… wait for it… you will not believe this… yes!!! He called her ‘Wato-san’, the Doctor!

Good grief!

Vituperative Comments

Over the years I have lost track of the ad hominem arguments that crop up on the social media. They are common, sadly so.

Just recently I deleted a post from my social media page because of a foul commentary describing my person. The post was not deleted because I disagreed with what they said and neither did I agree to delete it to satisfy their ego.

No. The post was deleted solely because of the disturbing language that was used.

Was I upset at the personal insults that were flung at me? No. Everyone is entitled to an opinion, it is taken for granted that not everyone will either like you or agree with you.

There are a number of people with whom I disagree or whom I regard as being unpleasant in character but that does not give me the right to print derogatory abuse at them.

If you feel the need to argue your case then do so with facts. An opinion can be valid, no doubt, but you must have the ability to reason out your opinion. Tell people why you have it; use logic; use common sense. But, above all, do not abuse the other party.

Specifically, do not abuse the other party using obscene language.

Many of us have social media pages that are open to public view. That public can include people who dislike the use of foul language and may well include children who should not be subjected to ‘Adult’ language; small children are just that – small children and not ‘small adults’.

Another thing that upsets me on this social media is that there are people who ask to be befriended for nefarious reasons.

I am, as you will know, a trusting soul who is gentle, warm hearted and sensitive to the needs of others. Consequently, when someone asks to be my friend I will usually accept them providing they appear to be using their real name.

The need to use a ‘nom de plume’ on social media is nonsense unless you are specifically hiding something. If you are friends then people will know who you are anyway – so why hide behind a false name?

However, that is not my complaint, really. 

The thing is that it is becoming increasingly common for people to ask to be your friend and then tell you that they work for Zuckerberg, or something. This latest one tells me that she was a banker in America but now works for the Ghana National Bank in Accra.

Of course, there is a sum of money involved that belongs to a deceased person – this time someone with the same surname as me. Could I help locate the rightful heir to this fortune or, perhaps – and even better, maybe I could receive this magnanimous payment myself!

How tempting this is. Not unnaturally a rather large amount is required from me to release these funds…

Do these people really think that you will believe this nonsense? Are they really so blind as to imagine that you take their word as absolute truth? Any and all of their words ring hollow in any sequence you care to arrange them.

In the words of the wonderful Maxim Bady, “These people are so stupid that, if we are lucky, they will forget to breathe and die’!

We should be so lucky!

Sadly, although the social media has a button that you can click to ‘unfriend’ people it rarely works. After ‘unfriending’ someone I check the next day et voila! They are friends once more!

I should add that I have very few friends. Those that I know on ‘Facebook’ are generally acquaintances rather than friends.

There are a few of people in America that I should dearly love to sit and chat with over a tea – or coffee, because they are interesting and intelligent people. They are people that have a sense of humour.

But actual friends are limited. These are people that you will stop a bullet to protect.

These are the people that I will chat with online. Please do not try to ‘PM’ me with a view to conversation if you are not in that category because it will not be reciprocated. 

Responding to my request for peace and quiet with foul and vituperative comments will lead to an immediate ‘unfriend’ click!

As Maxim Bady would now say, “Yalla.”

Cameron Highlands

Stepped out of the car outside of the ‘Copthorne Hotel’ into 17˚C.

Now, for those of you that are in the throes of recovering from a mini ice age that temperature, which is the equivalent of 63˚F, would be somewhat blissful.

Let me explain to you that when you live in a tropical paradise the temperature suddenly plunging to near zero is traumatic.

There was a sudden desire to check in as rapidly as possible and throw myself under a nice soft, warm duvet and hibernate!

The reason we decided to visit the Cameron Highlands was that we had dropped off my Mother-in-Law to be looked after temporarily by her son. We also thought it would be nice to visit with our small ‘granddaughter’, Jannah.

From Right: Baharuddin, Mak, Jannah and Me

Having accomplished that errand there was a need to restock with vegetables – with which the Highlands are replete.

My beloved is in the mood for ‘juicing’. A term that is unfamiliar to me but involves pressing sundry vegetables into a machine that turns them into a drink. It is my steadfastly held opinion that it would be much more efficient, and less wastage involved, if you were to eat the whole vegetable in the first place.

But, hey! I’m a Philistine when it comes to diets and food. Light of my Life is an acknowledged expert in the preparation of raw materials into magnificent repasts.

Thus we pointed the car in the direction of Simpang Pulai and headed up the hills to the summit. Well, nearly the summit. My Toyota Estima can hardly be considered to have the same kind of versatility as an off-roader, which would be needed to get to the actual peak of the Highlands.

Thus I leapt out of the car and almost instantly froze to death on the steps of the ‘Copthorne’. Fortunately the staff are ever friendly and efficient and sped our bags up to the room on the 13th floor – yes, there is a 13^th floor here and not a 12Ath floor.

Instead of getting under the covers we slid gently on the forming ice down to the ‘Old Town White Coffee’ for a warming bowl of mee curry and then raced back to the room and, happily, sleep.

'Old Town' Mee Curry

After a wonderful breakfast in a Malay café in Kea Farms the next day we went into harvesting mode. This was interspersed with a visit to a lovely couple who are in the process of having their new house built in Tanah Rata – and a magnificent edifice it is, too.

Breakfast Cafe in Kea Farms

One of the Veggie Stalls in Kea Farms

One of the signs in a Veggie Stall

(Hey! It's better than my Chinese writing!)

Part of Beloved’s joy in finding ‘Mushroom Starter Kits’ at ‘S’Corner’ was dampened slightly by taking over an hour (nearly an hour and a quarter) to drive from Tanah Rata (also to get the delicious tea bags from the ‘Bharat’ teahouse on the main road towards Ringlet) back to the ‘Copthorne’!

Lesson learnt! Do not, ever, go to the Cameron Highlands on Friday, Saturday or Sunday.

Lunch at the ‘Smokehouse’ was cancelled due to difficulties in travelling instead we turned back towards Simpang Pulai and left Cameron Highlands for Kuala Lumpur.

The Smokehouse Hotel, Cameron Highlands

Lunch had to wait for a late one at Tapah Services where we had a lovely mee rebus at ‘Pak Tam’ and then resume the journey through absolutely torrential rain. Fortunately, Light of my Life was driving that part so I was able to sleep through it.

The kitchen floor is now covered in vegetables so I guess it’s veggie pie on the menu tomorrow.

Can’t wait. It is almost an addiction!

A.A. Milne

Alan Alexander Milne was a playwright. I should modify that a little, he was a playwright until the success of his stories about Winnie the Pooh. 

He also wrote ‘Toad of Toad Hall’, ‘The Ugly Duckling’, ‘Wurzel-Flummery’ and many other stories.

Born in 1882 he lived in Hampstead, England, but he died farther up the road in Hartfield in 1956.

His stories are still immensely popular and many of them have been adapted into movies. Most of them are based on Winnie the Pooh and his friends but there is also a ‘Christopher Robin’ film.

Surprisingly there are also movies made in the 1920s and 1930s of his stories. There is also a short film of thirty-two minutes entitled “How Do You Spell God?” made in 1996 whose cast of three includes Hayden Panettiere of ‘Heroes’ fame.

His stories, particularly those of Winnie the Pooh and the wonderful ‘Toad of Toad Hall’ need no embellishment here. They are justifiably famous and well read.

What appears to be less well known is that AA Milne also wrote short verses for children.

I have owned, since I was a very small boy, a book of verse by AA Milne.

After almost seventy years of ownership it is now in a somewhat disreputable condition having been pored (pawed?) over by many children and read from by many adults to children.

I should like to share a few of these little gems with you now.

Cover of the Book

Title Page

(Note that it is the thirty-fifth edition)

One of AA Milne's most Favoured Poems

I Know That a Few of my Friends Will Like This One

One of My Personal Favourites When I was Small

My Grandad, Rest His Dear Soul!

 I hope that these verses gave you some pleasure as they have done for children and adults over the years. 

Note that both the verses and the illustrations come from a gentler age. An age when children were children and not small adults.

Human-Trafficking

We seem to be, as a species, extraordinarily selective about the things we believe or those that we discard from our consciousness.

There is, no doubt, an opioid problem on the streets of many major cities. 

Malaysia and Singapore have the death penalty for anyone caught smuggling drugs, irrespective of the type of drug, if the quantity meets a pre-determined amount considered to be as saleable. In other words the quantity is meant to support a dealer or dealership.

Does this make a difference to the drugs available on the street?

No. It does not.

Vast quantities of drugs of all kinds are available easily everywhere. Customs officials in combined operations with the police force sometimes pick up a shipment and celebrate the discovery in the press. The media will extol the virtues of the agencies and proclaim that, “1000 kgs of drugs have been confiscated. We are winning the war on drugs!”

They are not. It is a drop in the ocean compared to the quantity that crosses the border into the country every day.

Marijuana is relatively cheap here as is MMDM (Mollies, Ice or Ecstacy). Cocaine and heroin will cost you a little more but home grown drugs like Ketum, also known as Kratom, are easily and readily available for very little cost. Indeed, if you know where to look you can go and pick the Ketum yourself, take it home, boil it and get a sort of ‘high’. Then you die if you are tempted to take the capsules.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mitragyna_speciosa

Drugs are not the only item that smugglers focus on. Guns, for example, are a common trading item

Cigarettes, too, attract the attention of smugglers as do alcoholic spirits because of the high taxation on these items in most countries. Here the illegal importation of ‘Kretek’ is common. ‘Kretek’ is a form of cigarette made from cloves and, sometimes, other flavourings. The word is onomatopoeic word representing the sound that cloves make when they burn. Some people prefer the ‘high’ you get from nutmeg, but that is another story.

Drugs, guns, alcohol, cigarettes are all common and, depending on the situation where you live, there will be other items that will attract the attention of illegal import-export businesses. Animals. Attractive animals – especially those that are endangered, are a special target. Some animals have a medicinal value to certain ethnic groups that makes them highly valued and therefore a smuggling target.

The main animal that is shuffled around the globe are human beings.

Not unnaturally you will think of the refugee crisis in Europe as being the prime mover for people from the Middle East and Africa. They number in their thousands, certainly.

There is also a market for shifting people from Burma (Myanmar now) to safety in various countries. 

Economic migrants are in every Nation where poverty or hardship exists. Sometimes the hardship is in the form of criminal activity engendered by the Governments of those countries. In this instance Zimbabwe and South Africa spring to mind but there are others governments who are equally repressive. The South African Government does not actively victimise its people but their inactivity in allowing crime to flourish places them high on the list of places to avoid. Zimbabwe, it must be said appears to be on the way to improved relationships with ethnic minorities, but we shall see what the future holds. Africa has not had a good record with governance.

Pakistan is another place where hardship and discrimination run rampant as does its neighbour, India, where being female is barely tolerable.

The hidden face of human trafficking is from places like China, Thailand, Philippines, for example.

Women, especially, are targeted for ‘special jobs overseas’ and enticed with wonderful opportunities that in reality does not exist. Instead they are shuffled off into little better than slave labour in a run-down factory somewhere. Even worse is that some of them, the better-looking ones, no doubt, end up in brothels.

Regardless of where they end up the people who enslave them will keep them shielded from the authorities. Their documentation will be withheld from them and they are often kept in poorly fed, uncomfortable and unsanitary conditions because food, comfort and sanitation cost money. It is cheaper to get another worker than it is to pay for the upkeep of the current ones.

Is this widespread? Yes. More than people like you or I would care to think.

In 2016 the National Centre for Missing and Exploited Children estimated that 1 in 6 endangered runaways reported to them were likely to be sex trafficking victims. Globally, the International Labour Organisation estimates that there are 4.5 million people trapped in forced sexual exploitation.

Although people are trafficked as forced labour, there are many used for child begging and organ removal. 79% of human-trafficking is said to be sexual. Unsurprisingly the majority (but not all!) of these are women and girls. Amazingly in the countries that provide information on the gender of trafficking it is women that make up the majority of those actually doing the trafficking!

The value of this trade is reported to be around US$150 billion annually.

The top countries that traffic humans are China, Russia and Uzbekistan. They join the likes of Iran, North Korea, Cuba, Sudan and Zimbabwe. In China the ‘One-Child’ policy and a cultural preference for male children perpetuates the trafficking of brides and prostitutes.

In Uzbekistan, the annual cotton harvest has been the biggest human-trafficking culprit. This is the World’s sixth biggest cotton producer and, each year, local officials force thousands of children to pick cotton in order to meet quotas cheaply.

Nowhere is completely safe. Prostitution and brothels are commonplace even in countries and States where they are deemed to be illegal.

Forced labour exists everywhere that a product needs to be made cheaply in order to be competitive.

Organs are needed constantly and need to be harvested from someone, somewhere.

How do you stop it?

In practice you do not. Perhaps, somewhat altruistically, you can make a dent in it by following the tips from the ‘The Muse’:

https://www.themuse.com/advice/take-action-7-ways-to-join-the-fight-against-human-trafficking

The main way to tackle it is to make people aware that it exists and not to wander around wearing blinkers.

If you see something suspicious – report it.

If it is not suspicious then no harm is done, but if it is suspicious then you will have played your part in attempting to stamp out this heinous problem!

Devon Cream Teas

There is considerable animosity about food. Specifically, food that is considered to be derived from a specific area of any country.

A prime example of this is the tiddy-oggy – also known as the Cornish Pasty.

Of course, those of us from Devon, a noble county, regard Cornwall as Devon’s biggest car park and thus the Cornish have no real opinions on anything.

However, the sons of Kerno do have opinions even if they are, from time to time, invalid.

Referring to the Cornish pasty, it is generally acknowledged that it came about as a simple meal for miners who slaved endlessly in the Cornish tin mines.

We understand as a truism that the Cornish taught the Welsh how to dig holes in the ground and gather whatever minerals they might find shiny and attractive. For the Welsh that would be coal, known to be solidified Dragon’s blood – hence it burns.

In the olden days the main source of protein for the Cornish was fish. Specifically pilchards. The primary vegetable would be potatoes but after the time of Sir Walter Raleigh, of course. 

Consequently, the main ingredient of a Cornish pasty would be traditionally pilchards and potato and yet great pride is now attached to getting the gravy for the meat and vegetable mixture correct.

The pasty itself is shaped so that the miners could hold the edges and eat the rest without having to wash their hands. The remnants of the ‘held’ parts would be discarded for the mine rats. 

Another bone of contention is the famous cream tea. Cream teas are an intrinsic part of the West Country. No visit to the Western counties would be complete without the famous scones with clotted cream and jam.

The problem here is that, in the first place, the cream has to be made from the milk of Jersey cows. Jerseys produce milk that is high in fat content. The cows must also be fed from grass pastures; artificial foodstocks are not permitted, as are foodstocks from turnips, cabbages, kale and other non-grass vegetation that will alter the flavour of the cream.

The second problem is that there is a particularly visceral response regarding the order in which the topping is placed on the scone.

Devon Cream Tea 

(but with whipped cream because clotted cream is hard to come by in Kuala Lumpur!)

In Cornwall the order is to put the jam on first and then put the cream on top of that. In Devon (except for Devonians who live on or near the Cornish Border who have been brainwashed) the cream goes on first.

This has become known as ‘Thunder and Lightning’. The cream goes first because you see the lightning first and then you hear the thunder (the jam) second.

There are those who believe that the use of syrup, a modern addition, is the only way that this dish can be referred to as ‘Thunder and Lightning’. This is an error that such persons' parents must be held liable for inflicting on them. Never, in all of my considerable time on this Earth, have I ever been offered – much less taken, ‘Tate & Lyle’s Golden Syrup’ on a cream tea. I must put this down as some aberration introduced in the same way as the term ‘Grockles’ (tourists) has been inserted into the West Country dictionary – by some form of marketing agency!

A cream tea is properly known as a ‘Devonshire Cream Tea’. It is, therefore, only right that a real Devonian should have the right to determine the correct manner of eating scones with cream and jam.

So there!

Oil Spills

Do you remember 1989? Specifically, do you remember what happened in Prince William Sound, Alaska, on March 24^th, 1989?

Yes, you are ahead of me. The Exxon Valdez ran aground on the Bligh Reef and dumped crude oil on to the ocean. The amount spilt, 10,800,000 US Gallons, was enough to contaminate 11,000 square miles of sea.

The ‘Exxon Valdez’ being recovered from the reef escorted by tugs and a coastguard cutter.

There were multiple factors involved to cause this event all of which can be easily found on ‘Wikipedia’. Not unnaturally, the company, Exxon, blamed the skipper even though he was asleep in his bunk at the time of the grounding on the reef.

This disaster resulted in the International Maritime Organisation introducing comprehensive marine pollution prevention rules (MARPOL) through various conventions.

How has this helped?

In 2010 on April 20^th, an oilrig called the ‘Deepwater Horizon’ let loose 4.9 million barrels of crude oil into the Gulf of Mexico. This is equivalent to 210,000,000 US Gallons.

‘Deepwater Horizon’

It was not a ship but an oilrig – so that’s all right, then. Doesn’t come under MARPOL.

Still, the learning curve was non too steep, was it? Perhaps nobody recalled the Ixtoc 1 oil spill in 1979.

This was a semi-submersible drilling rig in the Bay of Campeche, also in the Gulf of Mexico.

The spill resulted in 3,000,000 barrels of crude drifting off on the ocean. That would be around 130,000,000 US Gallons.

We do not seem to learn, do we?

Double hulled ships are not impregnable, they are not leak proof. Oil rigs can, and do, fail.

Piper Alpha in the North Sea killed 167 people when it exploded.

‘Piper Alpha’

We have not gone near the Buncefield fire, the Castillo de Belver oil spill, the Torrey Canyon disaster, the Prestige oil spill, the MV Tasman Spirit, the Cosco Busan oil spill – the list goes on and on and on… So many others.

All of these were ecological disasters.

The pollution in every case was widespread. Thousands of birds and marine animals were killed either by the crude oil or by the solvents used to disperse the oil.

Moreover, Vancouver and the native tribes in the area of the Exxon Valdez oil spill are still owed money. The oil companies just shrug it off and continue as normal without shouldering their responsibilities.

https://www.seattlepi.com/local/article/Exxon-still-owes-for-Valdez-spill-1198238.php

Fortunately these things are now in the past. Oil spills have been stopped by legislation and good self-governance by the transportation and oil companies.

Well, not really. 

In the last few months we hear of a pipeline leak in South Dakota. That must be enormously embarrassing for the company who owns the pipeline since they are currently trying to get an extension built on the existing pipe.

Embarrassing?

Of course not. What is a bit of farmland compared to the economic viability of transporting oil cheaply from Alberta down into the USA through a pipe? The oil companies will be wondering what all the fuss is about.

‘Keystone’ Oil Pipeline Spill

Is that it? Pipelines are not ships or oilrigs so no problem. We can forget that one, can’t we? Of course, this is not the only leak from an oil pipe. They happen on a relatively frequent basis – more so than the oil companies would like you to think.

Oh, but it hashappened again.

Another pipeline. Unbelievably this pipe is under the sea.

This time it is off Kalimantan, a place called Balikpapan, on the coast of Borneo. It was first reported on March 31^st, 2018.

The operating company, Pertamina, said, at first, that it was from a ship but have now admitted that it came from one of their pipelines.

The spill now covers an area larger than the city of Paris and is burning fiercely. It is burning because the workers on site tried to clear it off the water’s surface by setting light to it.

Five fishermen have been reported as dead. 84 acres of Mangrove forest are contaminated; an Irrawaddy Dolphin (a protected species under Indonesian Law) has died making the species even more rare now; the people of Balikpapan have complained of health problems as a result of the slick.

The Dead Irrawaddy Dolphin

“Authorities declared a state of emergency in the city on April 3, and warned residents not to light cigarettes in the area. They also distributed gas masks to protect against the acrid fumes and smoke.

The East Kalimantan police and Pertamina are investigating the cause of the leak, after divers from the company found the pipe had moved some 328 feet from its initial position on the seabed.”

Police said that a criminal prosecution may follow.

What can be done?

As long as oil companies and those who transport or explore for oil are allowed to be self regulating there is nothing that can be one.

We have seen from the Exxon example that such companies ignore their responsibilities especially in terms of compensation.

Safety is expensive but so is the contamination and pollution that results from these spills; so are the deaths that are commonplace near and on these slicks – not just human deaths but wildlife also.

At some point someone has to grasp the bull by the horns and tackle this problem. 

We know that all projects are governed by three primary parameters:

1.           Cost

2.           Quality

3.           Time.

Only one of these will rule any project. Sadly, the overweening parameter has been cost but that has to stop. Time is of the essence but more so is quality.

Quality costs, quality takes time but quality is now paramount.

If for no other reason than that the World is running out of oil, we cannot afford to spill it out on the oceans and the farmland.

The time has come to stop this waste and the ecological disasters that ensue from it.